There are several stories of ladies who have been approached by guys that do not appeal to the emotions of the lady with a proposal. Although, the lady knows in her heart that this guy is true to his conviction, he has nothing appealing to her from his physical appearance, so she begins to struggle with the ‘will of God’. The same scenario has occurred to several guys.
The question of being attracted to God’s choice of marriage is an age long debate that has generated a lot of arguments. Some argues that God’s choice doesn’t consider what your emotion says, claiming that that would be listening to your flesh. Many who believe this belong to the conservative circles in the body of Christ. Those on the other end of the rope believes that God’s choice must consider your attraction. In situations like this, the truth is always somewhere in between.
In our days, the question of attraction has been given a lot of attention so much that believers now base their decision on it alone and this has led to a lot of catastrophes as several marriages of tongue talking believers have hit the rocks even after few months. It’s a sad reality that we have found ourselves in.
Attraction is very important in the choice of marriage, but how much priority you give to it depends on how much your soul has been conformed to the image of Christ. There are lot of tongues talking Christians whose soul has been captured by all sorts of idols. What attracts your soul is a function of what resides in your soul. It is the idol in the soul of a man that can make him to be bent on marrying a light complexioned lady.
For us to have marriages that stand on the rock, we must prioritize things of eternal values rather than “frontsides and backsides”. A lot of good Christians have had their lives shattered by being married to a spouse with little or no eternal value. When you are believing God for a spouse, the kind of a person you should have in mind must be someone who has eternal values and not just temporary attributes. Attraction should be the least of your concern because it is the easiest to find.
You don’t need favour from God to marry a spouse that you will be attracted to, you just need to open your eyes, but if you will marry a spouse that would involve God, then you must be ready to prioritize eternal things far above attraction. I have identified three things that a believer must look for in a potential spouse and they are ‘The Pursuit of God’, ‘Understanding of Times and Season’ and ‘Developing the Fruits of the Spirit’.
These 3 things must be evident as the core values of anyone that you would consider as a spouse before the question of attraction can come in. This is why you must trust in the Lord for the provision of a spouse. This is beyond what a man can use his (or her) head to calculate. I believe that you should be attracted to whoever you choose as your spouse, but do not let it come before these essential core values.
As you are looking for such spouse, make sure that you are also making yourself ready to be such a spouse too.